Ellie Middleton, 25, always felt like something about her was different.
Growing up, the Yorkshire, UK, native would "really struggle to maintain friendships," she says. "After I was in a friendship group for a little while, they would kind of get fed up with me for whatever reason and I wouldn't really understand what happened."
She'd also have "six months of being fine, bubbly, energetic, ambitious," she says. "And then every six months I would just, like, crash and burn." That crash would include low moods, anxiety and panic attacks.
Middleton was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and depression early on but felt there had to be some other underlying issue. Turns out, she was right. A few years after dropping out of high school at 17, she got diagnosed with both attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder and autism. Each can bring on its own unique social challenges and burnout.
Soon after getting diagnosed, Middleton began sharing her experiences online. And they caught people's attention. Today, her Instagram account boasts more than 30,000 followers and her LinkedIn page more than 220,000. She uses both to advocate for the neurodivergent.
Here's how Middleton was able to take her experiences and turn them into a tool to help others.
'I was like, "Oh my God, yeah, that's me"'
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After leaving high school, Middleton worked entry-level jobs at a post office and a bank. During a counseling session through one of her jobs, Middleton mentioned getting upset with her then-boyfriend for telling her he would leave a night out early. He ultimately decided to stay and she couldn't figure out why he didn't do what he said he was going to.
"The counselor just said to me, 'has it ever been looked into why you take things so literally?'" she says. In the past, Middleton had heard literal thinking was one of the traits of autism. She set off on a Google search to learn more, reading about it on the National Health Service website. She came across symptoms of ADHD along her search as well.
As Middleton scrolled through social media posts about the disorders, she came across people and, specifically, young women like herself describing their experiences with them.
"I was like, 'Oh my God, yeah, that's me," she says. "That's me. That's me."
'I did a post about what it means to be professional'
Middleton officially got diagnosed with ADHD in October 2021 and autism in April 2022.
Around the time of her ADHD diagnoses, Middleton had started working for a branding agency where she was encouraged to cultivate her own presence on platforms like LinkedIn. After considering what she could bring to the table in terms of relevant posts, she decided to weigh in with her personal work experiences.
"I did a post about what it means to be professional," she says. "And so I was kind of talking about the things about me that didn't make me any less professional. So, for example, the fact that I have tattoos and piercings." She included the fact that she's open about her neurodivergence and mental health as well.
And the post went viral.
"I think I got to around 10,000 followers overnight," she says. She started getting asked to speak at conferences and getting hired to consult about neurodivergence.
"And it just kind of grew and grew and grew from there," she says.
Take the time 'to really reflect on what works for you'
Today, Middleton has been able to build a career around her voice and experience. She does speaking engagements about neuro inclusivity, does paid collaborations on her social media platforms and runs an online community for the neurodivergent called (un)masked.
When it comes to advice for other people in the community, Middleton says two things. First, find people like you directly around you or even online. She emphasizes "how validating it was to listen to the stories of other 20-something-year-old women talking about their experiences" when she found them online.
Second, she says, take the time "to really reflect on what works for you, what doesn't work for you, what support you might need," she says. It's easy to soak up the messaging about what a typical day or week should look like for an adult or young adult. But that might not always be appropriate for everyone.
For Middleton, for example, a 40-hour workweek is a lot. It took her time to realize that she needs to work in smaller chunks, take breaks between sprints and take more time off to avoid burning out.
"Really just check in with yourself" to see if there are tweaks you can ask an employer for in your schedule or ones you can even make for yourself, she says, to make your day-to-day work for you.
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